Making the Band Hogwarts style
by dead roses
Summary: Quidditch is gone! The Ministry of Magic is making a new fine arts requirement! Whatever will our heroes do?
1. Chapter 1

Not mine, blah blah, blah, you know the drill. Carry on lol.

Making the Band

It was a glorious morning in the Wizarding world. Birds were singing and chirping happily…occasionally screaming but that was only when they came into contact with the Womping Willow. Nonetheless, it was to these intermixed sounds that Harry and Ron woke up one spring morning, just days after getting back from their Easter break. The morning was pleasant and their moods certainly matched. They were back at school with their friends and they could get back to Quidditch practice. With the exception of Potions, there was little that could change this feeling of contentment. Too bad that this period was not meant to last much longer…

Walking down to breakfast in the Great Hall, Harry was perplexed to see Angelina crying her eyes out. Alicia Spinnet patted her back awkwardly, looking as though she had no idea what to do. Katie Belle stood to the side, looking on but with a slightly guilty expression on her face.

"Blimey, what's got her knickers in a bunch?" Ron looked horrified at the sight of it.

"You know Angelina," Harry said, remembering his Quidditch captain's turbulent nature, "More than likely, it's some daft girl thing we could never hope to understand."

"There you two are!" They turned on heel to see Hermione storming over to them. From the look on her face, Angelina wasn't the only girl in a tizzy today.

"Er…hey, Hermione- Uff!" She had grabbed the boys firmly by their arms and was dragging them over to a bulletin board at the back of the great hall where Harry noticed a rather large group of students was gathered.

"Mind telling me where the fire is?!" Harry muttered, wrenching his arm back to himself.

Hermione's face was incredulous, "How can you not know?! This affects both of you more than anyone!!"

"No more Quidditch!!!!! My life is over!!!!" Roger Davies was suddenly looking at a butter knife he'd forgotten to put down, with a sick fascination. Ron and Harry just looked at each other in horror and ran over to the bulletin board, pushing and shoving their way to the front. A first year cried out beseechingly but to no avail as the teens trod over him in their frenzy. Oh well, the kid was a Hufflepuff anyway.

There it was; the message that had everyone up at arms. Ron was so appalled that his mouth dropped open and his hand stopped midway through the task of getting first -year blood of his sneakers.

**Staff at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry regrets to inform its students of the dissolution of certain clubs and activities, effective immediately. Due to lack of funding, Gobstones, Quidditch, Charms club, S.P.E.W., Hexes and Curses…but Not for anything Evil Club, and The Unicorn Society are all to be disbanded. **

"This just can't be happening," Draco said in a monotone voice, staring straight ahead at nothing in particular. Harry just snorted.

"Yah, he would be sad not to have an excuse to throw a hex at somebody-" Harry about fainted as he saw Draco produce a tiny glass unicorn figurine and hold it to his chest, a single tear rolling down his pale, smooth cheek. What the hell had happened? Everyone was going bonkers, Quidditch was disbanded and to top it all off, he had just silently described Draco's cheek as "pale and smooth" to himself. Knowing his luck, the author was going to get evil and come up with a badly-written story plot resulting in Draco and himself revealing, long hidden feelings of secret longing and desire despite the enmity so obviously present between them in all Harry Potter books.

**AUTHOR: grunts angrily and starts hitting the spacebar rapidly, deleting large chunks of newly-spoiled storyline**

"Keep reading!" Hermione snarled in disgust. Sure enough, below that last paragraph, there was even more.

**The Ministry of Magic has expressed concern over a lack of musical and fine art related curriculum at Hogwarts and demands that said subject matter be imposed into Hogwarts life. Do to a lack of funding for paints, clay and other such fine arts supplies, only Music shall be added. To make this change all- inclusive, the program shall consist of the formation of a pop band, consisting of only 5 members, two of which shall be Fred and George Weasley because twin adolescent boys are mandatory in all main stream pop outfits. All others who wish to try out for the remaining three spots may sign the sign-up sheet posted below. Hogwarts staff is sure that the student body shares our excitement in these changes. **

"Lack of funding for S.P.E.W.?!" Hermione raged, "They never reimbursed me for a single ball of yarn!" But Harry was busy looking at the sign up sheet below. At the top of the list was Katie Bell's name and the Patil twins had already signed up as well. That would explain the funny look Katie had had on her face earlier. It looked as though, he wasn't the first to find out though. Angelina had broken off the tears and uttering a Xena-like war cry, was trying to run Katie through with a sausage skewer!

"TRAITOR!!!" she yelled in rage. Katie just let out a girly scream and ran for it. Glancing up at the staff table, Harry saw that, as always, Dumbledore seemed absolutely unperturbed by the discord below and had commenced sticking Burtie Bott's Every Flavor Beans up his nose. Looking elsewhere, Harry also saw Ron's brothers who had attempted to make a run for it. McGonagal had hexed them, rendering them stiff from the neck down…oh my…er…back to the story…

"You can't make us join your sissy little band!" bellowed George.

"We refuse to wear tight Abercrombie jeans and learn contrived dance steps while lip-syncing vapid lyrics!" Fred added.

"Not to mention that since we're twins, one of us will be doomed to come out of the closet when our career finally peeks and declines," George commented and then, as if comprehending his words for the first time, a look of horror dawned on his face, matched moments later by Fred's and they were dragged, sobbing from the hall.

"This just can't be our life, can it Mate?" Ron whispered behind Harry. Harry could only nod his agreement.


	2. Chapter 2

All right so this is more like a sub-chapter. I definitely plan to get on with the nitty-gritties as the Hogwarts crew competes for hyped up glory. As alway, I state that I have no rights to Harry Potter or any of its characters. Hope you like this bit and I'll have more up soon!

There were few times in Harry's life when he had ever been so disgusted. This new band rubbish even blew away the time Dudley had realized that by consuming the proper amount of beans, 90 minutes later, he could fart out his ABCs and then proceeded to tie Harry to a chair so he could demonstrate.. All right, maybe this wasn't quite as disgusting as that but it was still a stinky situation.

"_Har Har!"_ thought Harry to himself, _"A 'stinky situation,' I made a funny!"_ He then proceeded to tell Ron and Hermione who just looked at him as though they thought Dumbledore wasn't the only one lodging magic jelly beans up his nose.

"Er…right. So, how are Fred and George," Harry asked awkwardly.

"They're all right, I s'pose," Ron shrugged his shoulders, "Madam Pomfrey's been giving them Calming Draughts ever two hours or so."

"Oh good," said Harry, "Start them on the drug-addiction early."

"Well, I think this is all silly," said Hermione, sitting down in one of those squashy Gryffindor armchairs, "and worse yet, I read the Evening Prophet last night. It says that these bands are being set up at Beaubatons and Durmstrang as well."

"Wicked!" interjected Dean Thomas, "Maybe we can have a 'Battle of the Bands' then!"

Seamus looked puzzled, "A battle of the bands? But only the Weird Sisters exist in the magical pop/rock industry. To have more than one popular music artist might throw our world out of whack!"

Hermione just rolled her eyes, "No, it wouldn't Seamus, you're being ridic-"

"He's quite right," a dreamy voice interrupted. They all turned to see Luna, standing there and looking blankly at all of them.

"How the hell did you get in here? You're a Ravenclaw!" exclaimed Ron.

"Yah, you don't see me traipsing up to your tower, do you?" snarled Hermione.

"Well, there was that time with the Polyjuice and the Slytherin dungeon,"admitted Harry.

"That's beside the point, Harry. You and Ron had the bodies of Slytherins at least."

Ron looked at Hermione admiringly, "I love you for your loop-holes."

Dean snorted, "I bet we'll find out you love her for a lot more than that in Book 6," and walked out the portrait hole with Seamus to get to class. Ron meanwhile, turned pink and Hermione just looked at him quizzically before turning back to Luna.

" Like I was saying, we don't invade your common room!"

"Would you like to?"

Hermione looked taken aback. Ravenclaws, after all, were supposed to be the geniuses of the school.

"Is there a lot of cool Science stuff in there that _they_," she gave a backwards glance to Harry and Ron, "could never hope to understand?"

"4 o'clock on Wednesdays is our Ancient Runes discussion hour and on Thursdays we all get together and do our homework and then, fifteen minutes later, when we're done, we erase it all and start over again because it's twice as fun the second time around." Hermione nearly squealed with glee.

"Deal!" she cried, "Feel free to abuse our common room!" and with that she shook Luna's hand.

Luna smiled dreamily, barely returning the hand shake, "Thanks but I find your common room rather boring. You all just sit around in plush chairs guffawing at each other's jokes. At least in Slytherin, they have fun making blood sacrifices on Fridays at midnight."

"Really?" Ron cocked an eyebrow, "And what do they do in Hufflepuff?" At this, everyone burst out laughing. Harry was bent double and Hermione lay twitching and spasming on the ground. Ron's face turned red again.

"Oi! What's so funny?!"

"Ron," Hermione could barely contain a snort of laughter, "Who would ever care to know what Hufflepuff does?" Realization suddenly dawned on Ron's face.

"Ahahaha! You're right!" and with that, he too fell to the floor laughing.

"A following reminder for all of you," McGonagall stated in Transfiguration class, "all members of the band shall be exempt from certain classes and all homework that interferes with rehearsals." Ron and Harry exchanged glances. Maybe there was an upside. Hermione, on the other hand, looked horrified.

"What do you say, mate?" whispered Ron. "Shall we take a go?"

Harry laughed, "Sure, why not? We won't get picked but at least the tryouts will get us out of class for an afternoon."


End file.
